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FeedSimulated Bible Evolution
Tuesday, December 13, 2005 → by Danieru
The Bible has mutated more times than the proverbial Gremlin, and yet I think there is still room for improvement.Hebrew begat Greek begat Latin begat English - and now introducing the Simplified-Chinese Bible.
What happens if you translate this into Japanese, then Russian and finally back into English? You effectively simulate the next stage in Bible evolution baby... Change is good, as The Evolved Genesis will show you:
Much more punchy don't you think? I call it Bible 2.0 - Bog: The Sequel!1:1 Occurring the first god? Paradise and the earth of structure.
1:2 Disorder of zone is right empty aspect? Darkness. It is holy. Resident of line inside above the water.
1:3 Bog? Photic and including in light of possession.
1:4 Observing optically right good marker, including in a quantity of darkness of bundle optically.1:5 God that named noon, the named darkness? Night. Possession? On, possession it is rapid. Right? One day...
1:8 God named paradise possession. On, possession it is rapid, you will straighten the second day...
1:10 God zone the named water?? Sea. Marker of the arrival of god observing right good.
1:11 Bog? Point of zone the main thing. Raw greensward, harmony. Green colors of child? Pastry? Wood? Each the nucleus of the arrival of the packet of pastry is capital. Thing including inside to form Earth.
For more on the historical construction of the modern Bible check out these articles:
Here's hoping that future generations will look back and see this as a turning point in Bible Evolution... Three language jumps in as many minutes, it's a miracle!The Bible and History - In what ways is the Bible historically accurate?
A Babel of Bibles - What hand did language have in evolving the modern Bible?
Bible Gateway - Search the contents of the Bible in thirty five, count them, thirty five, different languages!
Categories: Religion, Weird, Humour, Bible, Christianity, History, Evolution, Language, Culture, Nonsense
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Māori Bible
"Genesis
1:1 He mea hanga na te atua i te timatanga te rangi me te whenua..."
Haitian Creolé Bible
"Genesis
1:1 Nan konmansman, Bondye kreye syèl la ak latè a..."
...and let's not forget the definitive Bible translation - destined to send God's word where no words have gone before.
The Klingon Bible
"Genesis
1:1 - Daq the tagh joH'a' ghajtaH cha'vo'chal je the tera'..."
Take your pick...
December 13, 2005 11:52 AM
April 10, 2006 1:12 PM
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